Seasonal Feelings

I always keep it real here… 

Like so many others, Winter is the time when seasonal depression starts to take hold of me. I will never forget the first time I experienced it. I was a sophomore in high school, and the stress of work, school, and the atmosphere of my basketball coach and teammates at the time was the perfect recipe for exhaustion mixed with mental and emotional abuse. And every year since, like clockwork, “basketball season” time comes and it brings its friends depression and anxiety with it. 

This year has been one where I have been so grateful for growth and lessons learned but if I’m being honest… It's been really hard, and there have been more days than not where I have woken up hoping to find a pause button somewhere, so I could disassociate from life and people for a month— or two. 

Lately, my heart is so heavy because it feels like everyone around me is also having a difficult time. Losing loved ones, scary health news, being hurt by relationships, and just struggling to deal with the stressors of everyday life. I am so over it. Truly, I am. I am over hurting, and I’m over watching the people I love and care about hurt as well. It’s scary the world we are living in and I need both Faith and Therapy to do anything.

This blog post is just a reminder to BE KIND. Everyone is going through something that you can’t see. It literally costs you nothing. Speak love over people instead of hate — your words have power. Be careful what you speak over yourself. (Proverbs 18:21 NLT “The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.) Find people that you can open up to a therapist, a community, a friend, a coworker —you need someone. Love on the people around you, don’t waste moments and don’t waste time. And if you're a Christian - Pray. I’m being so serious. Pray for the world and people like you never have before. Don’t neglect the power behind prayer. 

If your year has been anything like mine. I am so sorry and I do divinely believe that relief is coming. 

And this last part may only be for me but I’m going to type it for anyone who will receive it … 

You are strong. 

You are capable.

You are loved. 

You are beautiful. 

You are deserving. 

You are called by God.